How to Win in Dating Apps
Ever wondered why you’re not getting results from dating apps?
Dating apps are the most popular way for singles looking for a relationship – they are easily available, easy to use and lets you chat with millions of singles. You don’t need to dress up to go anywhere, and it is much easier to for shy singles to start a chat online than walking up to a stranger to start a conversation in real life.
But for many users, dating apps have been disappointing experience. Many singles reported getting poor results from dating apps – some complaining they have difficulties in starting chats, while others groused that they are spending too much time browsing and chatting.
We surveyed more than 100 male and female dating apps users, to learn what attracts them to other singles, as well as the stuff that really turns them off. It turns out that most users share the same likes and dislikes about behaviors on dating apps, and they fall into three main categories…
1) Mummy says not to talk to strangers
This is so obvious that we should even really be talking about it, and yet this is the No.1 reason why users are reluctant to chat with you! They say that they are unlikely to chat with users who have sketchy profiles with unclear representation of how they look.
“I won’t chat with anyone who doesn’t show his or her face – that’s just creepy! I want to know who I’m talking to. And if I have to guess what you look like because you posted a group shot or used a dog face filter, I’ll just ignore you.”
We were taught not to talk to strangers as kids, and this holds true even in adulthood. Users who reveal little about themselves come across as suspicious or creepy, so it’s no wonder that users are reluctant to chat with someone who doesn’t care to share anything about themselves! “I’m not looking for an essay, but if you have a blank profile, I’m likely to pass on you since you can’t be bothered to do even the minimum,” said Sylvia, 26.
Vague profile photos are a big no-no as well, since they suggest you are hiding something. Anne, 24 shared the popular sentiment, “I won’t chat with anyone who doesn’t show his or her face – that’s just creepy! I want to know who I’m talking to. And if I have to guess what you look like because you posted a group shot or used a dog face filter, I’ll just ignore you.”
A good majority of users surveyed said they will chat with users with clear profile photos and a short write-up to say something unique or interesting about their personality. Be genuine, and don’t say the obvious (like ‘I enjoy travelling’ because who doesn’t ?). It’s ok to state your limits (so long as they’re politically correct), because nobody wants to waste time if they are not what you’re looking for. It is that simple – create a proper profile page!
2) Let your photos do the talking
Klick lets users post photo updates in the public feed, which is a great way to be seen by other users. It is dating app meets social media. Ran a marathon? Baked a cake? Returned from a vacation in Europe? Post a photo update to promote yourself pro-actively instead of waiting for someone to swipe onto your profile – it is the best way to get increase your visibility and get more chat requests!
Klick is also a great way to connect with like-minded singles. If you lead an active lifestyle and want to connect with singles sharing your zest for life, you can search for them using hashtags in the feed, such as #active or #fitness. All the photo posts with the corresponding hashtags will be shown, so you can start to connect with like-minded singles! Every post gets updated to your profile page, so other singles will get to know you better. Let your photos do the talking if you’re uncomfortable about writing a long profile.
If you lead an active lifestyle and want to connect with singles sharing your zest for life, you can search for them using hashtags in the feed, such as #active or #fitness.
3) You had me at hello… or not.
Conversation is an art, and nowhere is it truer than on dating apps. Users receive so many chat messages, so it is easy to be drowned out. Not everyone has a repertoire of pick-up lines, so how can you impress the other users on a dating app?
“For starters, don’t just say ‘hello’ and leave it there… that comes across as quite arrogant. If you want to start a conversation, don’t expect the other party to take the effort to find out more about you!” said Claudia, 28. “You don’t need clever pick-up lines – say something that shows you’ve read our profile, or maybe something interesting about yourself.”
People are flattered and are more likely to continue the chat if the topic is about them. Read the profile of the other party, and if you’re using Klick, check out the photos that they posted. Start your chat with some questions or comments about them – it shows them that you’re interested in them enough to do your homework. It’s a small but important detail!
“You don’t need clever pick-up lines – say something that shows you’ve read our profile, or maybe something interesting about yourself.”
Even when you have a conversation going, things can still go wrong for you. Jasmine, 29 has a pet peeve about long conversations, “We are on dating apps, so the conversation should focus on us trying to understand each other. When they (the other party) start talking about social issues or about everything under the sun… it can get quite tiring to keep chatting. Ideally, we should just chat enough to see if we are comfortable enough to meet up, or just move on if we’re not.”
The important thing in chatting is to get to the point quickly before fatigue sets into the conversation. Don’t use dating apps as messaging apps – you should chat to create a level of understanding between you and the other user, to see if both are comfortable enough to meet up, or move on already! Otherwise you might find yourself being ghosted in a chat.
You’ll greatly improve your chances on a dating app if you focus on fixing these three points. Present a clear and proper profile – just put yourself in others’ shoes… would you talk to someone with a profile like yours? Post relevant photos to promote your personality if you’re using Klick, and connect with like-minded singles. And finally, focus on your chats to establish trust and relatability, and move on to your first date without excessive delay!
Just follow these tips and you should see your dating apps experience improve considerably!