Don’t Lose Yourself in a Relationship

You’ve probably come across this pretty common scenario. Someone you know got into a relationship, and very soon the relationship has all but consumed the person, leaving behind a barely recognisable shell of the person you once knew.

It is important that you maintain yourself in a relationship. While you need to make some accommodations for the other party in a relationship, you should not lose yourself in the process. Learn to maintain your personality and create some personal time for yourself, your family and friends.

1. Stay in touch with your friends and family
When you’re in love, it seems that there are only the two of you in the world. Therein lies the very real danger of alienating your family and friends, who have stood by your side before you entered the relationship. While it is great to want to spend every moment with your loved one, you will need the support from family and friends. Don’t be the kind of friend who will only look for you when they are in a breakup (you know exactly what I’m talking about!) Set aside some time to catch up with your family and friends – they deserve the attention and time from you.

2. Keep your “me” time
Personal time is critical for self-reflection and thoughts, so be sure to reserve some time for yourself. Spend some quiet moments to do whatever you want to do for yourself, and to engage in some deep thoughts. Our lives can be very hectic, but personal time is very important if you want to be yourself (see the next point).

3. Don’t forget to be yourself
When you entered the relationship, your personality was what your partner was attracted to. Over time, due to circumstances and perhaps disagreements, you may have made some changes and concessions to your personality – some changes may be for the better, while others may be made out of accommodation. It is easy to lose oneself in a relationship, so spend some quiet time reflecting on your relationship, and always check in with your family and friends – they know you more than you think.

Personal time is critical for self-reflection and thoughts, so be sure to reserve some time for yourself.

4. Hang on to your passion, dreams and interests
Think back to the time when you had dreams and passions. Do you still have them now that you’re in a relationship? Our dreams keep alive our spiritual self, and imbrue with us a sense of purpose. Being in a romantic relationship is a wonderful thing, but we should never abandon our goal and purpose in life, because they keep us driven and focused. It is difficult to imagine a more wonderful life than one filled with both love and purpose, so keep your dreams alive!

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